The Man Who Killed Osama

When Jake Darren meets Jo Anne Arnout, he's immediately smitten by her beauty. He convinces her to marry him, and the two set out on what's supposed to be a romantic honeymoon in Beirut, Lebanon.

But a funny thing happens during their trip: Jake kills Osama bin Laden, not once, but twice. And as if that isn't enough to liven up the adventure, he then has an out-of-body experience on the Himalayan border of Afghanistan and Pakistan.

Even as Jake realizes that he's actually killed imposters, he becomes convinced that God has chosen him to accomplish great things. Meanwhile, the real Osama receives similar messages of greatness from Heaven through the Archangel Gabriel.

But this is what Jake gets for marrying the daughter of a Chicago drug dealer with al-Qaeda connections. Of course, it doesn't help that his beautiful mother-in-law was once in love with the most notorious terrorist in the world-before the events of September 11, of course.

Despite the raucous ride with familial complications, Jake knows that he must not give up. He must track down the wily terrorist at all costs, so that history will remember him as The Man Who Killed Osama.